CBS Radio

"FOUR STARS (Highest Rating). Easily the most eye-popping,
jaw-dropping, head-spinning theatrical spectacle to hit
Hollywood in many a year! Kudos to directors Maggie Rowe,
Jill Soloway, and Amit Itelman, who all deserve Tony awards
(or, at the very least, one of those cheap plastic trophies
you can find in most Hollywood souvenir shops). HOLLYWOOD
HELL HOUSE is more shocking than "The Exorcist," more
frightening than "Night of the Living Dead," more
disturbing than "Gigli." It makes Mel Gibson's "The Passion
of the Christ" look like a Jerry Lewis movie from the early
60's! But unlike most horror shows, this one has a happy
ending, complete with fruit punch, doughnut holes, and
redemption! The moment I left the theatre, I rushed home,
threw my yarmulke in the fireplace, tossed my menorah in
the dumpster, ran out to the middle of my front lawn,
dropped to my knees, and with arms raised and face looking
skyward as tears flowed down my cheeks, screamed at the
top of my lungs: "Thank you, Jesus! Thank you, Jesus! Thank
you, Jesus! Thank you, Jesus!" (After about ten minutes of
this, paramedics arrived and administered thorazine. I
think one of my neighbors must have complained.) But if
you have ever sinned in the past, are presently sinning now,
or are contemplating the possibility of perhaps sinning
sometime in the future, RUN -- do not walk -- to The Steve
Allen Theatre this Saturday. One of the unique aspects
about this show is that it is the ONLY Hollywood production
ever to be officially approved by God Himself AND the Bush
administration! Hallelujah and Amen!! ------ Todd
David Schwartz, CBS Radio